Understanding Breasts
Science and Society have something in common — they fail us from time to time. As I write this, I remember a joke Trevor Noah made on The Daily Show at the beginning of the Corona outbreak in Wuhan before WHO announced it as a pandemic. He was sarcastically explaining how a renowned virologist advised that clean hands would prevent contracting the virus and just like Trevor, I couldn’t see how washing hands is an upper hand over an outbreak that looks like something out from a zombie film.
Science doesn’t always have all the answers. Remember puberty? Most importantly, do you remember how it was taught in school?How did puberty hit you? Did you check everything on the puberty list for your gender?
And society is just not what it promised too. Society is nosy, judgemental and just stressful. It doesn’t have to get into your system to know — by looking at your outer appearance, it can tell how you’ve been served and what you’ve been dealt. As a teenager, before puberty eventually found its way to me, some other teenagers around me were already prim, proper and ‘womanly’ and I was my ol’plain self. I didn’t care about this at all because I knew puberty was inevitable — it’s science or was it?
It came and I hated it!
The menstruation was messy and the boobs didn’t look anything like the ones I saw on the television, in magazines, in my hostel or even in my house. I had always dreamed of full, round and perky boobs and when these hormones finally decided to do the only job they had, they gave me half-filled, not-round and mid-perky boobs. This is where the trouble started from.
Let’s do small science (all the things I am going to say are all online. I just went to research and read to find these)
Science is once again confused; we don’t know for sure if the breast is an organ or a tissue. Some say it’s a distinctive organ {like other organs look just like each other}. Breasts, according to WebMD are made of specialized tissues that produce milk (glandular tissue) as well as fatty tissue. The amount of fat determines the size of the breast. And Oh, genetics too. Your weight also determines the size of your breast, I have realized when I add weight, I also get bigger breasts and when I lose weight, my breasts follow suit (but not drastically).
Basically, the breasts have no mind of its own. There’s nothing you did or didn’t do that determined the kind of breasts life dealt you. Just like menstruation, it’s one of the inheritance nature keeps for you until you’re ready to bear the responsiblity and you’re supposed to take care of it till the day you stop caring.
What holds the breast in position? Connective tissues and ligaments provide support to the breast — so no bones or even muscles. So, it’s not out of place that these lighter fibrous elements get tired after a while and just drop the ball, becoming obedient to the law of gravity. If you were holding a cup of water, wouldn’t you want to put it down for at least a while?
Enough with science. Let’s deal with you and I — our behaviour and mindset.
If you’re a man, you have some preconceived notions about how a “proper” breast should be and those checks aren’t scientifical bro:
It must be pretty. It must be perky. It must be just the right size.
Your mother probably taught you that a young maiden’s breast are supposed to be high up as proof of her chastity, “innocence” and virginity. Your favourite shows or porn sites (if you are into that kind of thing) have shown you on countless occasions the standard you should expect of the woman who you would be with. You even avoid ladies with big breasts so as to play it safe but you don’t know that Amaka’s small breasts are pointing downwards in a cute way. And now that you know, it’s a little strain but you can’t talk about it so as not to ‘hurt her feelings’. If the reason you’re with that your girl is because of her perky boobs, it will end in premium tears because gravity would happen, old age would conspire against you and hormones might not be kind to her as well.
If you’re a woman, you either fall in any of these categories:
You are single, haven’t had kids yet and have perky boobs (I don’t really care the size) but your breasts are winning the fight against gravity. Go girl. Kepp fighting. Don’t lose that fight just yet.
You are single, haven’t had kids yet and don’t have perky boobs (they are probably midway, like mine) and you’re worried there would soon be a fall out even before you’re 30. You won’t be like those #youngforever women you know and see on the internet and it scares you. I am the breast whispherer and I’ve come to let you know that it’s okay. Keep investing in those good bras, take care of yourself and stop obsessing over how far down your boobs are going to go.
You’re single with no kids but your boobs are far gone and it has ruined your self-esteem at some point in your life and you just can’t deal. You feel ashamed to undress in front of other girls. You don’t even stress with backless dress or swimsuits, you know how to stay in your lane. I don’t know how you feel but I can tell you this one thing — all of us are coming to meet you las las. You just arrived at that destination before we did. On a more serious note, it’s just breast. Fatty tissues, some muscles and mammary gland. Invest in strong support systems both for your breasts and the humans around you. Love yourself ma’am. Most especially, love your breasts.
You are married, have kid(s) and still have perky breasts. CONGRATULATIONS! But it’s still not an achievement. Okay, maybe it is. I’m not a hater. I may never catch you saying it out loud but you think it. You go “See Moyo’s breast. Single girl beyen! Emi ti mo ti breastfeed gan, oyon mi wa kanpe” Don’t do it. Don’t be that woman using what you didn’t do anything to get {and surely doesn’t deserve cos’ I don’t think life does background check on the recipients of these gifts} to belittle another woman. Remember, #womensupportingwomen. If you see a sister not wearing the right bra, help. Have those conversations. Send them your plug.
You are married with kids and your boobs have changed; they are different since you breastfed or since you had your baby. I just want to say that it’s okay too. This doesn’t mean you should let your self-confidence and self-worth go down with the Olympus. You are beautiful and still the woman your husband married. You don’t even have to overcompensate with the other wonderful things you have because these fallen boobs are part of what you have now and you gatta own it.
