Sonderful

In one of the episodes of ABC’s number 1 family show, Modern Family; the family set out on a trip to Hawaii to celebrate Jay’s birthday and a lot of things was going wrong in everyone’s lives. So, that episode had short cuts of the family in their present headspace and physical location with intermittent flashes of the build up to that place. Cameron was trying to cheer up Claire who had a terrible fear of flying and was saying he usually plays a game at airports. He looks at a stranger and cook up an idea about them.

I’ve tried to do this a few times — take a look at a complete stranger and write a plot of the summary of their lives and it was fun.

Until the day I thought to myself that every stranger out here has a lie as real and as complex as mine.

Then my journey got better because I found the word for this feeling. It’s sonder.

Sonder is one of those words that describe the feelings we have but can’t articulate.

Picture of author. Just wanted you to put a face to the words.

Did you know that there’s a word for almost everything we feel but can’t describe with words?

The feeling to itch the top of your nose? The annoyance you feel when you find someone really attractive? The tiredness you feel from having dealt with the same issue over and over again?

Sonder happens when you realize that the person standing close to you or passing by is actually a person with the same or more intensity of pressure, uncertainties, issues, challenges and fights to face. It helps you to stop psychoanalyzing them. It stops you from being judgmental. It helps you give them a benefit of the doubt.

Go out there and enjoy your sonderful moments